Friday, December 3, 2010
I, literally, had to look back in my calendar to remind myself what I did in the past year.
There was a lot of awesome mixed in with just everyday stuff...and I couldn't grasp one singular moment that thrilled me completely.
Mostly, what happens, is that I'm sitting somewhere, usually over drinks and food with my people, and all the sudden I realize how fucking unbelievably lucky a person I am.
Every face is adorable (to me at least), every belly laugh is a god damn revelation, every bite of food and sip of cocktail is more enjoyable because I'm where I'm supposed to be.
This happens at Taco Tuesdays, this happens over brunches that last for 4 hours!
Or on road trips, with Tecate in hand, while giving each other mad amounts of shit while the warm sun is setting on our faces.
You see, there is no one moment when I felt alive. I feel alive all the time.
I'm breathing and loving and giving everything I can and return I'm getting it back 3 fold or 5 fold because everyone else I know is living in the moment and being with me as much as I am with them.
Am I lucky, HELL YES. And I try to acknowledge that everyday.
And seriously, who needs ONE MOMENT?
I got so many moments, I don't know what to do with all of them...but just roll around in them loving every minute.
Oooh, but I DID see The Human Centipede with a couple of handsome jerkbeasts.
And that kind of changed everything.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
This prompt bums me out.
There is so much that I do that doesn't contribute to a writing life.
And writing is something that I'd love to do more than anything else.
I guess the real question is why AREN'T I writing?
I'm not writing because I'm watching TV, reading, hanging out with friends, washing the dishes, texting, tweeting, napping, working.
And although this list of things is perfectly fine - I mean, you should be able to do all that stuff - but they become excuses for not writing.
Actually, some of them are perfectly absurd excuses.
For instance, "I've had this Netflix movie for two weeks". Or, "I need to do the laundry".
And really, fundamentally, I think it's more, "I'm really scared to start".
I remember, a long time ago, I had a friend that told me, "It's okay to call yourself a writer. The more you do it, the more you are it!".
And so I went around calling myself a writer, but not really producing anything. I guess I thought if I said it enough that the words would just simultaneously fall out of me.
But that's not the way it works.
It's a practice and you have to do it everyday, without excuse, because that's the only way that it can be coaxed and forced from the recesses of your brain.
So similar to meditation - one must practice in order to receive its benefits.
One must stop talking about the practice...AND PRACTICE.
And here I am. I'm writing. RIGHT NOW, I'm doing it.
And I must admit, it's terrifying...but it's the kind of wonderful feeling that one feels when they catch themselves falling on ice.
That empowered feeling of knowing you were in control of yourself enough to maintain being upright.
The sublime feeling of knowing you righted yourself and can walk on with your head held high.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Only if forced. I usually, in hindsight, have moments of clarity that I'm never entirely sure will inform further choices in my life.
But I probably should.
And Reverb 10 is how I plan to.
First, I should address the fact that I haven't blogged since July. Believe you me, it's been weighing uber-heavy on my mind. It's not like I ever meant to stop - I just got sidetracked living. That's okay, right?
Well, that's going to change. I've been perusing photos and trying to get my ducks in a row and there should be some new updates soon. I promise.
Still, I feel like this Reverb 10 thing might provide a good jump start.
I don't want my blog to just continue to be a recounting of porch drinking and wild nights.
Don't get me wrong - I love those things...and I promise to continue to post pics of my friends acting the fool over and over again.
But going back to what I said earlier...I rarely reflect and I want to start.
Here's what Reverb 10 is about via their website:
Reverb 10 (#reverb10) is now an annual event, an inspired response to (and evolution of) #best09. It’s an open online initiative that encourages participants to reflect on this year and manifest what’s next. It’s an opportunity to retreat and consider the reverberations of your year past, and those that you’d like to create in the year ahead. We’re connected by the belief that sharing our stories has the power to change us. We look forward to reading yours.
And that brings me to the first prompt.
December 1 One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
(Author: Gwen Bell)
The one word that I would pick for 2010 is TRY.
Try it. Taste it. Feel it. Introduce yourself. Dive in. Take a risk.
This year has been me putting myself out there and praying that I didn't fall flat on my ass. And you know what? I didn't.
And the reason I didn't is because every time I tried, I had two people reminding me that I could.
Or I met 4 new people that caught me just before I ate shit.
I'm not saying this will always work for me...but I'm not saying that it won't work for you.
I have met the most amazing people in 2010. People I'm not letting go of...and it's because I tried.
I need to remind myself of this because I get cozy, as we all do, with our friends, our worlds. We're creatures of habit and we like to keep it simple.
But I'm not to keep it so simple that I'm not willing to let out a giant cleansing breath and step forward into this life and the great adventure I'm due.
I need to continue to step forward, try, and believe that there will be phenomenal people all around me that will want good things for me...good people that might even reach out to me when I've tried and fallen down.
Monday, July 26, 2010
My baby sister that I've just been given the blessing of knowing in recent years.
She came to visit earlier in the summer and stayed with me.
The funny thing about the two of us is...we're both, essentially, only children.
But we want to be sisters...always wanted to have a sister.
Now we do...
Miriam gets it.
She's a tight lady friend and she has a sister...
She's a blast too - so, I drug her along on a sisterly adventure.
We brunched at Parallel 17 and flirted with the adorable waiter...
Borrowed a bike from the Denver Bike Share...
And by borrowed, I mean my sister ALMOST paid $130 to have one of these things.
Totally not worth it, but that's a discussion for another day!
Our bike ride took us down Broadway to Barry's on Broadway where they have a new skeeball game!
Miriam kicked our asses repeatedly!
Yes. They DO give you a free shot when you get over 30,000 points!
I was on a mission.
We tore up the place...
Later, we headed over to Governor's Park for some food and camaraderie!
LeVar joined us...
He's a dreamboat.
I told ya...
And spirit animal forever, Tim was there too!
Even good old Marcelo showed up!
And Dustin with his awesome t-shirt that I covet.
and just generally looked good.
HOW WE DO.
And I realized something...
I love my people and when I'm surrounded by them I feel safe and comfortable.
What better an environment to introduce my sister!
When all the people you love are in one place...it makes it hard to imagine being anywhere else.
And I'm lucky as hell.
Lucky times a bazillion.
For all of it.
Friday, July 9, 2010
So, the sweet, gorgeous people over at Talk Thirty to Me did me the distinct honor of posting a little article I did on female friendships.
And by the sweet, gorgeous people, I mean LeVar and Sara!
They both maintain blogs, respectively, that are a joy to read...giving you insight into the their worlds and how truly brilliant and special they are!
Check out Straighten My Tie and Meanest Look and support them and their efforts!
DO IT BECAUSE I SAID SO.
Do it because knowing that there are smart and sincere people working as hard as you are to eek out as happy a life as possible in this world is a comfort and pleasure!
AND READ MY ARTICLE! I'm cute and smart, for heaven's sake!
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Yeah, I'm that daughter.
I think at some point you just STOP talking about how old you are and start celebrating how you far you've made it.
My mother...has made it.
She's a gem in the world - I'm sorry if you don't know her, but take my word for it, she's the best.
I really did invite almost every single person I know to this party.
Lovely Amber, rockin' Miriam, dreamy Maura Bryn...
My philosophy is that if these people can get down with me...then Mom is a natural fit.
I had the meatloaf.
Don't knock it until you've tried it.
Seriously, if you've never been to Steuben's...get your ass down there.
EVERYTHING is good.
And also, not that I need to bring it up again - but there is a dreamy bartender that knows his business. Hit him up. He works evenings.
The delightful Delicious Dia and Sandy Hens (SISTER FROM ANOTHER MISTER, YO!)!!
Tim's down there...being demure.
Karin and Mike.
These people travel all the way from Colorado Springs and they are always ready to party.
I'm honored to know them. I stole them from Spencer. They're mine now!
I bought a grip load of cupcakes from Gigi's over on 6th and Grant.
Do yourself a favor and stop there! They have flavors you always wish existed!
I'm sorry you have to look at this gross picture of me, but that lighter and it's flame were too over the top not to post.
Mom was overwhelmed by our serenade.
I can't reiterate how terrible a song 'Happy Birthday' is to sing.
It's literally in no one's range. It's painful.
Little did I know that Mom's ear was popping and she couldn't hear any of us!
Everybody got a cupcake of their own to pig out on.
Kristin clearly loves red velvet.
Mama Kel is all over this one.
And me, I got this malted chocolate nonsense with a straw for novelty.
It was fun...being with these people and sharing my Mom, but sadly she was straight miserable and if there's anything I hate...it's when my Mom isn't happy.
I quickly tabulated the bill (Which no one should ever let me do...) and took her home where we applied a heating pad and watched 'Arrested Development'.
She's the best kind of Mom.
I didn't mention that Mom brought Wynnie along for the trip, did I ?
Isn't she adorable? Like a tiny hilarious furry comedian...She cracks me up!
We took her for a walk through the city...and found a little street fair.
Mom and I split a snow cone.
Mom got a little out of order when I forced her to get the Tiger's Blood.
"I don't like Tiger's Blood!"
Wynston had some snow cone too...how could we deprive her?
Just for the record, Wynnie loves Tiger's Blood.
Seriously, do you have any idea how lucky I got when fate handed me to her?
She makes me laugh so hard because she knows me, she gets me.
Wynnie is sort of the baby of the family now...
I guess it's not me anymore.
She's cute...so, I'll allow it.
After our major walk about...we ditched Wynnie and made our way up to Red Rocks.
Mom looks like she's waving the paparazzi off...
I bought Mom tickets to see Kansas, Styx and Foreigner...
She's terrible at these kinds of pics.
I didn't post the best (worst) of these photos.
Some of them we laughed at so much that we seriously had to stop trying and just drink beer.
So, Kansas was up first and I gotta say...beyond, "Carry On My Wayward Son"...I don't know a lot of their catalog.
Still, when they sang the aforementioned song...I sang my guts out.
Actually, I sang it karaoke style with Bob Marshall and my BFF Jen at my friends' wedding.
It was mind blowing. I'm sure of it.
This is what my mother has in her pockets.
Candy, change, and dog treats.
SUCH A WEIRDO DOG LADY.
Mom made me take this picture of this sad butt.
Styx was pretty bad ass, but Mom kept being taken aback by how none of the original singers were in the bands.
She stomped her feet and got super upset until their new singer started and he sounded EXACTLY like the old singer.
Tommy Shaw looks exactly the same as he always has and may very well be a robot.
Domo Arigato, Mr. Roboto.
They saved the best for last.
As a kid, my Mom used to take me on A LOT of road trips through Wyoming.
Back then, I could tell you the quickest route from Cheyenne to Rawlins, why Arlington was the worst place on the planet, and tell you all about the hobo pools in Thermopolis.
And on every road trip...Mom blasted the Foreigner.
Again, their new lead singer sounds exactly like the old one.
And he's younger...so, he can really run around the stage and rock out.
At the end, they brought out some kids to sing along to "I Want to Know What Love Is".
If you had a lighter...you'd have broke it out.
Sadly, the crowd was filled with old people and they were all texting their kids on their iPhones about how expensive the Coors Light was.
But me and LKH were having a blast!
It was a memory maker for sure...especially the couple that stood next to Mom and were feeling each other up while tokin' up on the ganj.
I love you Linda!
You're the best weapon I have in my arsenal...because it's all love.
So much love that I hardly know how or why it works!